Friday 5 April 2013

Kaitlin's First Week of Preschool!

I'm so excited to share about how Kaitlin's first few days of school went. To me it's really a huge milestone!

Kaitlin was supposed to be starting school on Monday but I decided to let her skip school for the first two days as she was still ill. So badass right! So young already skipping school.

I really didn't want her cough and cold to get worse cos obviously there would be tears and screaming when I leave her. Also, we all know how it's common for children to fall sick at school with all the germs everywhere and the teachers aren't very attentive to tiny details like cleaning off mucus on the student's face. So I definitely wanted to avoid her falling more ill than she already is.

Well, besides that I got to admit that a little part of me found it hard to have to send her off to school and hear her wailing like mad and not be able to help her :( Since two weeks ago I've been thinking of not sending her to school already, and maybe just let her start school when she's in nursery. I've sat in for the classes, and have had a clearer picture of how the teachers are like and to what extent can they cope that I really felt the best option was for me to look after her. Well it was too late, cos I already paid for her school fees and all so no choice there right, plus afterall I had planned to send her off to school when she was 18 months, so why think twice now?!

Yes, my heart's too soft! Sure, I can get mad at her, but once she sobs for real, my heart turns into mush, and I'll just give in. Even Daddy Li claims that I spoil her. Well, whether you want to think of it as spoiling her or not I just can't help it. She's my babygirl and I don't want her to feel unloved or not cared about. Worse still, I don't want her to end up falling ill or possibly end up having difficulty breathing because of all that crying. By then it would be too late right!?

So well, I finally reasoned with myself that what's got to be has got to be done, so off she went to school! Got Daddy Li to take off as well so that we could see our babygirl off on her first day.

First Day:
I stayed with her in class for close to two hours before leaving. Of course she cried, and my only thought was to just leave as soon as possible so I can't hear her crying or screaming. If I stayed there any longer I might have just bust back into her class and rescued her.

I went back shortly after and happend to see the teacher carrying her while walking back to the classroom. Felt super relieved that she was not crying and in true princess fashion, she got to be carried. I've never seen the teacher carry any kid before and walk around so I guess she got her way. It wasn't before long that she started crying again cos she saw me. Big oops on my part for letting her spot me. When we picked her up she was teary and was clinging on to me real tight.

The teacher mentioned that she didn't want to eat her lunch. Wasn't too worried about this since Kaitlin is quite a fussy eater. It was also mentioned that she enjoyed the gym, kind of expected this cos she had fun in it the last time she was there. Also, she didn't cry much during lesson time only during the transitional periods which well most of the new kids do the same so I guess it wasn't all too bad.

She was pretty chirpy and happy after we left the school. (Sidetrack: I know my eyebags are the size of Russia :( Mommy was more anxious about Kaitlin starting school than the babygirl herself!)

Napped well in the afternoon. Took super long to fall asleep at night..I wondered if she was worried about going to school the next day. One of the times that she woke up in the middle of night, she started crying and screaming and couldn't be soothed. Probably night terrors/nightmare. After quite a fair bit of soothing, she finally went back to sleep.

Second Day:
She woke up super early (around 6.15am) on her own, and partly cos Daddy Li's alarm prevented her from falling back asleep. It wasn't as pleasant as the first :( this time I just dropped her off and left. No staying in the class. She wailed for me so bad like "mommy don't do this to me please", omg my heart totally shattered. Totally had no appetite or mood for anything, I was just counting down till it was time to pick her up. I even stayed around the area just in case of anything. It was feedbacked that she cried alot today and kept wanting to be carried. Would be consoled by songs or the teacher singing. Same like at home. Teacher says she likes music. Didn't want to eat lunch again, so I will be packing her lunch to school the next day so they can feed her. I don't mind at all cos the lunch probably has salt and all the other preservatives and I'm anti-preservatives when it comes to food for Kaitlin. Sad to hear that she didn't want to play at the gym today :( Didn't interact much with the other kids, kept pointing here and there for the teacher to walk to. Wasn't interested in the toys at school. This was quite surprising to hear as she usually likes to fiddle with the toys they have there. I was thinking probably she was too upset to want to play. Teacher says she's quite smart cos whenever she sees a staff coming in she will want to leave with them to go out and push the teacher away, probably to get away from the classroom. Her bottle was empty today. I hope she didn't cry that much and as a result got so thirsty and drank up all her water. She walked out with a staff today when I picked her up. Once she saw me she started crying and screaming and walked over to me. This even as I walked towards her. Quickly picked her up to soothe her and she seemed so angry and sad.

Seems like it was quite a traumatic day for her. She didn't nap well and woke up frequently. Normally she just takes her nap and doesn't wake up in the middle of it. Was very cranky even when we were home. Kept clinging on to me. Only after her evening shower did she seem to be in a better mood. Nearing bedtime she fussed again, but fell asleep faster than the first night. Probably tired out. Woke up frequently at night.

Third Day:
Finally it's Friday! Which kid/adult wouldn't rejoice about this!? Well I guess to Kaitlin every other day is the same for now. We just reached the school entrance and she started fussing already. Was clinging on to me tightly. By now she is sort of used to the procedure of checking her mouth/legs/hand and taking her temperature, which I feel is a good sign. I dropped her off but this time I sat her down on the mat and then say goodbye to her. I hope this would help her think that I am dropping her off and not that the teacher is trying to steal her away from me. I don't want her to end up disliking the teacher and class. Hope this works. She cried immediately. I looked back and had to resist going back in :( Teacher feedbacked that she was crying non-stop till the last hour of class. Didn't participate much in class. They had gourmet class today so she got to take this home:

However according to the teacher she didn't want to participate, so I don't really think it's her work, but I suppose she must have done a little something here and there. Ate a little of the lunch I packed for her. Teacher also mentioned that she wanted to be left alone today. Didn't want to be carried and rather just be in her corner. WHY SO EMO NEMO my little girl? :( She was a little teary when I picked her up but not screaming away so that was good. She fell asleep on the way back but her nap lasted only 15-20mins. She was happy when she woke up. Not as cranky as the day before, but keeps wanting me by her side. Only natural of course.

All in all, the past few days have been super exhausting for us. It's hard for Kaitlin to accept this new arrangement, but I got to tell you that it's been hard on us as well. Having to see her deal with this, and at the same time deal with her crankiness. Couldn't stop thinking and worrying about her as well. We'll see how the next week goes. Hopefully things get better, if not I still might pull her out within this trial period.

With regards to the school, I must admit that there were certain things/issues that happened which I was not very happy about. This also made me regret my choice. However, since she has started, I'm just hoping everything gets better. 

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